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08-23-2007, 10:23 PM | #1 |
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For the Ladies
One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his sweatshirt.
Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, "What setting do I use on the washing machine?" "It depends," I replied. "What does it say on your shirt?" He yelled back, "University of Oklahoma." And they say blondes are dumb... ------------------------------------------------------- A couple is lying in bed. The man says, "I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world." The woman replies, "I'll miss you..." ------------------------------------------------------- "It's just too hot to wear clothes today," Jack says as he steps out of the shower. "Honey, what do you think the neighbors would think if I mowed the lawn like this?" "Probably that I married you for your money," she replied. ---------------------------------------------------- Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man? A: A rumor. ------------------------------------------------------- A man and his wife, now in their 60's, were celebrating their 40th wedding anniversary. On their special day, a good fairy came to them and said that because they had been so good, each one of them could have one wish. The wife wished for a trip around the World with her husband. Whoosh! Immediately she had airline/cruise tickets in her hands. The man wished for a female companion 30 years younger. Whoosh! Immediately he turned 90. Gotta love that fairy! ------------------------------------------------------- Dear Lord, I pray for wisdom to understand my man, love to forgive him, and patience for his moods. Because, Lord, if I pray for strength, I'll beat him to death AMEN ------------------------------------------------------- Q: Why do little boys whine? A: They are practicing to be men. ------------------------------------------------------- Q: What do you call a handcuffed man? A: Trustworthy. ------------------------------------------------------- Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name? A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough. ------------------------------------------------------- Q: Why do men whistle when they are sitting on the toilet? A: It helps them remember which end they need to wipe. ------------------------------------------------------- Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail? A: Rename the mail folder "Instruction Manuals." |
08-23-2007, 10:33 PM | #2 |
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For the Ladies
I'm offended.
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08-23-2007, 10:40 PM | #3 |
Guest
Posts: n/a
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For the Ladies
Quite frankly, I didn't get any of them ???. I was told they were funny though. Sorry.
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08-23-2007, 11:52 PM | #4 |
Sr. Contributor
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For the Ladies
I know some men that would take offense to this...........
__________________
I love my Victory Cross Country Tour 106. Smells like Victory! Ultra's are Limited There are two types of Harley riders. Those that trailer them and those that push them. The most Interesting Man in the World "Find the things in life you don't do well and don't do those things" Member # 0005 |
08-24-2007, 01:06 AM | #5 |
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Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: San Diego County, CA
Posts: 350
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For the Ladies
LMAO
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08-24-2007, 08:16 AM | #6 |
Top Contributor
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Jefferson City, MO
Posts: 6,272
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For the Ladies
Why is it VV finds this stuff so funny? ???
__________________
Jeff Platz VBA #0002 VBA VP-Global B.A.C.A. Hoss 2005 "StrongBear" Black/Silver Todd and BD |
08-24-2007, 08:20 AM | #7 |
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For the Ladies
She must be a man hater!! ;)
Disclaimer: No offense intended to any man haters out there. <marquee>SMITE ME MY CHILDREN!!!!</marquee> |
08-24-2007, 08:30 AM | #8 |
VBA Founder
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Lindale, Texas
Posts: 6,846
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For the Ladies
Man hater...........I work with several of them.
No offense to the working man haters out there.
__________________
Robert "Trip" Hilliard VBA/KawaNOW - Founder/Past President VBA # 00001 Trip's Website Custer 09, 18 / Maggie Valley 11 / Eureka Springs 09, 17 / Antlers 09, 10, 11, 13, 15, 16, 17, 18 Texas Hill Country / Deals Gap / Colorado / Wyoming / Montana / Utah / More trips for Trip |
08-24-2007, 08:54 AM | #9 |
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Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Jefferson City, MO
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For the Ladies
But without us, who would kill bugs? BD's face can only be in so many places at once.
No offense to any bugs who may or may not have been killed.
__________________
Jeff Platz VBA #0002 VBA VP-Global B.A.C.A. Hoss 2005 "StrongBear" Black/Silver Todd and BD |
08-24-2007, 09:08 AM | #10 |
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For the Ladies
<marquee> </marquee>
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08-24-2007, 11:56 AM | #11 |
Member
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: San Diego County, CA
Posts: 350
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For the Ladies
SWB.....You're ok dude.....love your comments!! lol
BTW....love men, just gotta laugh at the obvious! Takes two to tango, after all.......... |
10-27-2007, 11:08 AM | #12 | |
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For the Ladies
Quote:
Who is this???? |
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10-27-2007, 11:42 AM | #13 | |
Top Contributor
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Jefferson City, MO
Posts: 6,272
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For the Ladies
Who is this who asked who is this?? ???
Quote:
Who is this????[/quote:0riot5cg]
__________________
Jeff Platz VBA #0002 VBA VP-Global B.A.C.A. Hoss 2005 "StrongBear" Black/Silver Todd and BD |
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10-27-2007, 12:58 PM | #14 |
Guest
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For the Ladies
</marquee>
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10-27-2007, 01:02 PM | #15 |
Top Contributor
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Jefferson City, MO
Posts: 6,272
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For the Ladies
Talking out your ass again?
__________________
Jeff Platz VBA #0002 VBA VP-Global B.A.C.A. Hoss 2005 "StrongBear" Black/Silver Todd and BD |
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