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07-11-2008, 03:46 PM | #1 |
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Cold First Date
We have all had bad dates but this takes the cake.
Jay Leno went into the audience to find the most embarrassing first date that a woman ever had. The winner described her worst first date experience. There was absolutely no question as to why her tale took the prize! She said it was midwinter... Snowing and quite cold...and the guy had taken her skiing in the mountains outside Salt Lake City, Utah. It was a day trip (no over night). They were strangers, after all, and truly had never met before. The outing was fun but relatively uneventful until they were headed home late that afternoon. They were driving back down the mountain, when she gradually began to realize that she should not have had that extra latte. They were about an hour away from anywhere with a rest room and in the middle of nowhere! Her companion suggested she try to hold it, which she did for a while. Unfortunately, because of the heavy snow and slow going, there came a point where she told him that he had better stop and let her go beside the road, or it would be the front seat of his car. They stopped and she quickly crawled out beside the car, yanked her pants down and started. In the deep snow she didn't have good footing, so she let her butt rest against the rear fender to steady herself. Her companion stood on the side of the car watching for traffic and indeed was a real gentleman and refrained from peeking All she could think about was the relief she felt despite the rather embarrassing nature of the situation. Upon finishing however, she soon became aware of another sensation. As she bent to pull up her pants, the young lady discovered her buttocks were firmly glued against the car's fender. Thoughts of tongues frozen to poles immediately came to mind as she attempted to disengage her flesh from the icy metal. It was quickly apparent that she had a brand new problem due to the extreme cold. Horrified by her plight and yet aware of the humor of the moment, she answered her date's concerns about 'what is taking so long' with a reply t hat indeed, she was 'freezing her butt off' and in need of some assistance! He came around the car as she tried to cover herself with her sweater and then, as she looked imploringly into his eyes, he burst out laughing. She too, got the giggles and when they finally managed to compose themselves, they assessed her dilemma. Obviously, as hysterical as the situation was, they also were faced with a real problem. Both agreed it would take something hot to free her chilly cheeks from the grip of the icy metal! Thinking about what had gotten her into the predicament in the first place, both quickly realized that there was only one way to get her free. So, as she looked the other way, her first-time date proceeded to unzip his pants and pee her butt off the fender. As the audience screamed in laughter, she took the Tonight Show prize hands down. Or perhaps that should be 'pants down.' And you thought your first date was embarrassing. Jay Leno's comment... 'This gives a whole new meaning to being pissed off. Oh, and how did the first date turn out? He became her husband and was sitting next to her on the Leno show. |
07-11-2008, 04:17 PM | #2 |
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Cold First Date
That's a riot......
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06 1600 Nomad Just call me Mac molon labe come and get it |
07-11-2008, 04:25 PM | #3 |
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Newmarket Ontario Canada
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Cold First Date
Thats a hell of a way to get to know each other....
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2002 Nomad aka Bountyhunter VBA #27 VROC #18951 |
07-11-2008, 05:44 PM | #4 |
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Cold First Date
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I love my Victory Cross Country Tour 106. Smells like Victory! Ultra's are Limited There are two types of Harley riders. Those that trailer them and those that push them. The most Interesting Man in the World "Find the things in life you don't do well and don't do those things" Member # 0005 |
07-11-2008, 07:11 PM | #5 |
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Cold First Date
BD, did anyone ever tell you you were a party pooper?
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07-11-2008, 10:31 PM | #6 |
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Cold First Date
Thats about the 3rd time around the block that story has traveled...
Every party has a pooper thats why we invited you............party pooper party pooper!!
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I love my Victory Cross Country Tour 106. Smells like Victory! Ultra's are Limited There are two types of Harley riders. Those that trailer them and those that push them. The most Interesting Man in the World "Find the things in life you don't do well and don't do those things" Member # 0005 |
07-11-2008, 11:39 PM | #7 |
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Cold First Date
Oh, well, there's really nothing new under the sun, eh?
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07-12-2008, 07:33 PM | #8 |
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Cold First Date
As an engineer in internet history I know I'm a stickler for the details and........................ oh never mind!!
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I love my Victory Cross Country Tour 106. Smells like Victory! Ultra's are Limited There are two types of Harley riders. Those that trailer them and those that push them. The most Interesting Man in the World "Find the things in life you don't do well and don't do those things" Member # 0005 |
07-12-2008, 09:41 PM | #9 |
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Cold First Date
Hah!
OK ya got me. I probably deserved that. You can be the expert on Jay Leno lore. |
07-13-2008, 01:00 PM | #10 |
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: 6th Floor up at the The Nervous Hospital up in East Central State, NC
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Cold First Date
Something didn't sound right about the story. I can understand how a wet tung could stick to cold metal, not a dry ass. If for some reason she spread the bush and touched the bumbler with the you know what. I may have bought it. Now make up a story 'bout that and tell it.
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??-Mar.2,2012 "Rocky" My Beloved Dog RIP Mike Tripp VBA#767 '96 800 Vulcan Classic 06 1600 Nomad 07 1600 Nomad "The shoes you buy at the Salvation Army is already been broke in"- Aunt Kawhead |
07-13-2008, 09:50 PM | #11 |
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Cold First Date
That's awesome!!!!!!
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07-15-2008, 11:36 AM | #12 | |
Sr. Contributor
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Cold First Date
Quote:
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I love my Victory Cross Country Tour 106. Smells like Victory! Ultra's are Limited There are two types of Harley riders. Those that trailer them and those that push them. The most Interesting Man in the World "Find the things in life you don't do well and don't do those things" Member # 0005 |
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